Happy New Year!
I hope your new year has been better and that 2024 will be better than you. My holidays and the New Year were very calm and peaceful on the outside, which means that my head is deaf. The New Year brings many things: reflecting the last 12 months, the pressure to explain what you want in 2024, and weight loss messaging everywhere (significantly raised through injections this year). Since I did not do a whole decoration of Christmas decoration Like the pastI’m going to share some photos here before I go in a long refreshing.
You can watch the video of the Holiday House Tour Instagram Or Ticatok.
There were more trees, but I think you get a summary!
Now to deal with silence: I don’t share it because I think people are waiting for me to post a new blog post, but because I need to get it out for myself. I started this blog about 15 years ago. No one knew what the blog was, Instagram was not present, and I was just a random 20 things in Kentucky that wanted to distribute some things on the Internet to the hope that I wouldn’t feel so lonely. I did not filter what I shared. The spray tan booths had posts about receiving stripes like zebra, the fact that I was a small car thick girl, and other random coops and observations. There was also a great focus of weight loss, which I allowed to go many years ago because I withdrew from the dietary culture. I have been fortunate that many people have kept careing that what I have said for so long is even when I am ready as a person.
With the addition of social media, divided attention, and the creation of content/”impact”, now a huge industry, more and more working, high quality images or video, fighting for spectacles, fighting for feed, getting followers, getting viral, and forced me to doubt what I am doing. Whenever I felt myself “my content is not good enough” I felt in jail, I remind myself of the spray tan zebra stripes and the “thick girl in a small car”. At that time, I myself did not matter who paid attention. My desire was never “creator”, most followers, or the most demanded with the brands.
There is fear of standing on the other side of the pressure on the online noise. People on the Internet can be so cruel – there is a great line between reaching people who can be helpful about your message and reach those who want to crush you. Fat hatred is so strong and technology makes it so easy for people to eliminate a hateful comments without assurance that it is at the other end of the screen. It’s really overall, and a way to leave them all.
Piloton Instructor Christine de Erkol often repeats this reference in his classes: “The most powerful thing that can tell us is what we say to ourselves.” What I said to myself in 2023 was much tough than me. If a friend does these things about himself, I cannot let him stand.
So in 2024, I don’t let him stand. 15 years ago is what is important today – that I feel comfortable, authentic, and incomplete. By doing so, I may force you to think about something else, introduce you to a new point of view, or see you and feel less. Self, I also hope that I see more and lonely. If nothing else, continuing to share it means that I am true to myself and did not silence myself with the fear that no one would like me.
Thank you for coming here. ❤
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